Mathias

It feels like a betrayal. God, it feels like a betrayal, all the more so when the smile vanishes from his face, when all of his actions seem delayed by the mere shock of it. And why wouldn't they be? The both of them have moved ahead as quickly as any normal relationship would, a few dates over the course of a couple of months, it's— it's nothing to be ashamed of, she tells herself, moving on. Mitchell might have been surprised, but she's an adult, and people move on from relationships. At the very least, she thought she could, she thought— she thought that she would, with Mathias, and it's only in retrospect that she realizes just how hasty it was, by her own standards. And how tangled all those emotions still are, at the end of the day.

"I did," she replies, barely above a murmur, trying her best to keep her voice strong, because that's the least that's deserved now, from her. To own up to the mistake, and to own it in full, everything that comes with it. Even if it means that a friendship might not even be salvaged from this. She presses her lips tightly together, feeling her chest lurch, arms wrapped around herself, as much as she can without straining herself. "I am... so, so sorry. You don't even know, I— I know, this makes me such an awful person, but I. I didn't think that I still felt for him as much as I apparently do."

The exhale feels suspiciously close to a sob in her throat.